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[livejournal.com profile] camwyn posted about wanting to hear Hugh Grant saying the line "Excuse me, I, ah, well, well, I could be wrong, but I seem to... erm... be a brain in some sort of... jar?"

My stupid brain misinterpreted this as referring to Hugh Laurie, and so I produced the following comment (slightly edited for infelicities of expression - the original is on the post above) which I think is perhaps worthy of reproduction.


I spent that night down at the Drones enjoying a convivial snifter with other habitués of that distinguished gentleman's resort; perhaps the evening may have degenerated somewhat - perhaps I may have had one or two more than Aunt Agatha would consider appropriate - but nevertheless I let myself into the flat at a decent hour - three am, if I remember correctly- and retired to my bed much as usual, Jeeves spiriting away my discarded garments and so on. A downright ordinary evening.

I woke the following morning at some confoundedly early hour, to what sounded like some bally birds cheeping outside the window - dashed inconsiderate when a chap's feeling fragile, I always think.

I essayed to open an eye. Something felt wrong. I attempted to feel for the bell on my bedside table. Why hadn't Jeeves brought in the usual pick-me-up? Something was very wrong indeed. I wondered blearily what it could be. Hand. Where was my hand? Why couldn't I see anything?

Suddenly light dawned - there in front of me, larger than life, was Jeeves, lifting... the cover... off my... jar. "Good morning, sir," he intoned in that impassive way of his. "Your tea is ready."

The cheeping noise continued, sounding louder and more mechanical. It seemed to be coming from a bank of machines opposite me. Where was my wardrobe? My bed? Where was I?

A horrible clarity invaded my senses, and I realised that my entire body was strangely absent. What was I seeing with? Where were my ears? What, in heaven's name, had happened to my arms and legs?

"Jeeves!" I cried - I found my voice seemed to issue from a different location from normal, somewhere up and to the right. I found myself strangely reluctant to utter my suspicions - they seemed so bizarre. "Jeeves, pardon me if I seem to be raving. I... I could be wrong, but I seem to... erm... be a brain in some sort of... jar?"

"Indeed, sir. You are quite correct. You are a brain in a jar - though I prefer the technical term brain cylinder."

I noticed, with a growing sense of horror, that Jeeves was wearing some sort of white coat affair, and was in the act of pouring my cup of tea into a kind of bally funnel arrangement in front of me.

"Jeeves!" I croaked. "Explain yourself!"

Date: Wednesday, 29 November 2006 05:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sea-cucumber.livejournal.com
How very cthulhoid! Love it :)

Date: Wednesday, 29 November 2006 05:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] haggis.livejournal.com
*giggles madly*

I like you!

Date: Thursday, 30 November 2006 03:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pozorvlak.livejournal.com
You're aware of [livejournal.com profile] indeedsir, yes?
[*suppresses brief shudder*]

I did something similar a while ago: behold, Jeeves versus Predator (http://pozorvlak.livejournal.com/5533.html)!

A thinly-disguised Bertie and Jeeves also have roles in my forthcoming Lightly Entertaining Edinburgh Fringe show (http://pozorvlak.livejournal.com/26451.html). I've done a bit more work on it since that was posted, but haven't yet uploaded the new version to t'interweb.

Date: Thursday, 30 November 2006 07:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pozorvlak.livejournal.com
Yes, quite.

I dunno: in general, I have no beef with slash. I'm not interested in it myself, but if people want to write it, fine. But Jeeves and Wooster slash seems so antithetical to the whole Wodehousian universe that I can't understand it: surely someone who actually appreciated the stories would feel no need to slash them? This may tie in with Douglas Adams' comments about how Wodehouse is one of those writers that every reader feels they and they alone understand, of course, but still. And I should possibly mention quite how much I love the Master's works, and particularly the Jeeves & Wooster stories.

And the neologism "Jooster" is just... appalling. Simply ghastly, my dear.

That said, someone on [livejournal.com profile] indeedsir did make a good point about the stories which I found in the ten minutes or so I browsed it: that every character in Wodehouse has an ideal match (Stilton <-> Pauline, Bingo <-> Rosie M. Banks, Dahlia <-> Tom,...) and that Bertie's is Jeeves. Agatha's efforts to marry Bertie off are thus misguided, because he's already found his ideal match. I broadly agree with this, but I think the non-romantic nature of their union is part of its perfection...

Date: Thursday, 30 November 2006 07:58 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pozorvlak.livejournal.com
:-)

I guess if I can make Jeeves a ninja, I can live with you making him a bawd :-)

Date: Wednesday, 29 November 2006 05:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] beingjdc.livejournal.com
My brain did the same thing. much better idea.

Date: Wednesday, 29 November 2006 08:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] beingjdc.livejournal.com
Oh Jeeves, it seemed like such a good idea at the time. Bingo had fallen in love, Finknottle was off with his newts, and the flower of English youth was charging around getting engaged to Florence like it was going out of fashion.

No, my brain said Hugh Laurie.

Date: Wednesday, 29 November 2006 05:54 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mirabehn.livejournal.com
Bwaaaaah!!!!

*giggles*

Sorry i've not replied to your e-mail yet. I think what with exhaustion and panto and stoof I may not be good for much until the last week before Christmas. But we *will* have our day together, dammit, even if we have to wait for it!

I'll buy your ticket tomorrow. :-)

Date: Wednesday, 29 November 2006 06:01 pm (UTC)

Date: Wednesday, 29 November 2006 06:47 pm (UTC)
ext_8103: (Default)
From: [identity profile] ewx.livejournal.com
Haha.

Date: Wednesday, 29 November 2006 08:56 pm (UTC)

Date: Thursday, 30 November 2006 01:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] curious-reader.livejournal.com
A brain in a jar reminds me of the Steve Martin film. I don't know if the title really was "The man with two brains". Steve Martin was shown brains in jars by some crazy scientist. He fell in love with one and wanted to find a body for her as he was unhappy with his wife.
Your decription reminds of how the brain must have felt.

Date: Thursday, 30 November 2006 10:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ladyfrances.livejournal.com
That is the title and it's the first thing I thought of too. Its a great film :) fun & very silly.

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