Would you be up for Feeling Gloomy on Saturday night? Text me and let me know :) (07929 615 972) Long shot, but I haven't seen you for ages and need company!
Yes, I did know that, and those are deliberate. the screening is to spare the blushes of people actually admitting to being shitty, not people going 'Whuh?' As most people, thank God, are.
I've been reluctant to say anything here because I am very far from believing that anyone has done anything wrong, and am not about to "admit to being shitty" when I haven't been. Quite honestly the tone of this post and the one after has a hint of bullying in it, and I don't respond well to that.
I kept a confidence confidential. I would not respect myself had I done anything differently. I imagine that goes for everyone, and while your likely anger at me (and others who knew) is understandable, it is also unjust.
I am also somewhat exercised by your apparent view that people would be vocally condemning Robert and Elise and Helen were it not for some kind of social cowardice. Apart from the fact that this is an insulting assumption to all concerned, it did make me wonder whether perhaps I am only not commenting here due to my own social cowardice. So, I gave in.
I feel no outrage or anger at all as to what has happened. Far from it. Some considerable sorrow as to the pain it causes you, but no outrage.
You yourself have a boyfriend now, or someone close to being that. Did you tell Robert about that immediately? I doubt it.
Nobody has betrayed you. Nobody has behaved badly. Nobody has done anything wrong. As far as I can see, that's the end of the story.
I can quite understand that you're feeling shocked and hurt, and that some anger is inevitable, even though it is not called for. I send you many, many loving hugs, and much sympathy, and I hope you can heal from this quickly.
I love you lots, Lucy. Whether you let this business cause a rupture between us is now up to you.
Please take care, stay safe. You're in my thoughts.
You may leave this screened or unscreen it as you choose.
I do not have a boyfriend. I have a friend, with whom I happen to have some affectionate physical contact. This is not the same thing. ]
You're so fucking sanctimonious. You cannot 'love me lots' and not see that this behaviour is completely out of order. Pouncing on one's so-called friends' immediate exes, while they are still trying to repair the relationship, is something which just Should Not Be Done.
cannot be coherent any loner
Robert has behaved badly, in only telling me about this because i was on the point of turning up at the Suite party. I'm not even going to discuss Helen and Elise.
I think you are making some false assumptions to the detriment of all three people concerned, but especially Helen. It troubles me, but it's not my responsibility to change your mind, even if I could.
Best to close this discussion now, because I'm angry too. I am sorry that you see me as sanctimonious. It's certainly a novel accusation for me, I'll give it that.
I am calming down. I do not want to cause an irreconcilable breach with you over this, as I am going to lose quite enough friends already. I am sorry I have been so rude and angry.
I am still not capable of responding appropriately to attempts to support the other side of the story, though, so if we can avoid that for a little while, it'd be good.
Ideally I just need people to reach out and tell me they understand that it hurts and help me cope with that, and leave the sensible bits on one side for now, till i can listen to them later. (I have said this in these words elsewhere, but being coherent enough to express it this clearly is rare enough that I have to reuse it when I get it right.)
And, thank you. I can barely stop crying myself, so mostly just *more hugs*
I am still not capable of responding appropriately to attempts to support the other side of the story, though, so if we can avoid that for a little while, it'd be good
*nods*
Right you are. No probs.
I wish it didn't hurt so much for you. Sending peaceful vibes your way.
no subject
Date: Thursday, 22 June 2006 04:47 pm (UTC)And are you OK? (Yes, I read between lines, so to explain: It's rare for you to typo...this reads all hiccuppy to me!)
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Date: Thursday, 22 June 2006 05:57 pm (UTC)hiccuppy is about right. See following post for actual events.
no subject
Date: Thursday, 22 June 2006 04:48 pm (UTC)*hugs*
no subject
Date: Thursday, 22 June 2006 05:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: Thursday, 22 June 2006 05:23 pm (UTC):)
Jason
no subject
Date: Thursday, 22 June 2006 07:49 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: Thursday, 22 June 2006 05:46 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: Thursday, 22 June 2006 07:49 pm (UTC)Would you be up for Feeling Gloomy on Saturday night? Text me and let me know :) (07929 615 972) Long shot, but I haven't seen you for ages and need company!
no subject
Date: Thursday, 22 June 2006 06:01 pm (UTC)I can currently see two comments from other people and your replies to them.
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Date: Thursday, 22 June 2006 06:06 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: Friday, 23 June 2006 11:50 am (UTC)I've been reluctant to say anything here because I am very far from believing that anyone has done anything wrong, and am not about to "admit to being shitty" when I haven't been. Quite honestly the tone of this post and the one after has a hint of bullying in it, and I don't respond well to that.
I kept a confidence confidential. I would not respect myself had I done anything differently. I imagine that goes for everyone, and while your likely anger at me (and others who knew) is understandable, it is also unjust.
I am also somewhat exercised by your apparent view that people would be vocally condemning Robert and Elise and Helen were it not for some kind of social cowardice. Apart from the fact that this is an insulting assumption to all concerned, it did make me wonder whether perhaps I am only not commenting here due to my own social cowardice. So, I gave in.
I feel no outrage or anger at all as to what has happened. Far from it. Some considerable sorrow as to the pain it causes you, but no outrage.
You yourself have a boyfriend now, or someone close to being that. Did you tell Robert about that immediately? I doubt it.
Nobody has betrayed you. Nobody has behaved badly. Nobody has done anything wrong. As far as I can see, that's the end of the story.
I can quite understand that you're feeling shocked and hurt, and that some anger is inevitable, even though it is not called for. I send you many, many loving hugs, and much sympathy, and I hope you can heal from this quickly.
I love you lots, Lucy. Whether you let this business cause a rupture between us is now up to you.
Please take care, stay safe. You're in my thoughts.
You may leave this screened or unscreen it as you choose.
no subject
Date: Friday, 23 June 2006 12:06 pm (UTC)You're so fucking sanctimonious. You cannot 'love me lots' and not see that this behaviour is completely out of order. Pouncing on one's so-called friends' immediate exes, while they are still trying to repair the relationship, is something which just Should Not Be Done.
cannot be coherent any loner
Robert has behaved badly, in only telling me about this because i was on the point of turning up at the Suite party. I'm not even going to discuss Helen and Elise.
no subject
Date: Friday, 23 June 2006 12:25 pm (UTC)I beg to differ. I can, and I do. Very much.
I think you are making some false assumptions to the detriment of all three people concerned, but especially Helen. It troubles me, but it's not my responsibility to change your mind, even if I could.
Best to close this discussion now, because I'm angry too. I am sorry that you see me as sanctimonious. It's certainly a novel accusation for me, I'll give it that.
no subject
Date: Friday, 23 June 2006 12:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: Friday, 23 June 2006 02:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: Friday, 23 June 2006 03:34 pm (UTC)I am still not capable of responding appropriately to attempts to support the other side of the story, though, so if we can avoid that for a little while, it'd be good.
Ideally I just need people to reach out and tell me they understand that it hurts and help me cope with that, and
leave the sensible bits on one side for now, till i can listen to them later. (I have said this in these words elsewhere, but being coherent enough to express it this clearly is rare enough that I have to reuse it when I get it right.)
no subject
Date: Friday, 23 June 2006 03:53 pm (UTC)And, thank you. I can barely stop crying myself, so mostly just *more hugs*
I am still not capable of responding appropriately to attempts to support the other side of the story, though, so if we can avoid that for a little while, it'd be good
*nods*
Right you are. No probs.
I wish it didn't hurt so much for you. Sending peaceful vibes your way.
no subject
Date: Friday, 23 June 2006 04:12 pm (UTC)Thanks for the hugs. Hopefully I'll see you at some point without too many social complications. Let me know if you want to arrange meeting up.
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Date: Friday, 23 June 2006 04:23 pm (UTC)Just about managing it now. Glad you've stopped too. :-)
Hopefully I'll see you at some point without too many social complications. Let me know if you want to arrange meeting up.
That would be very nice indeed. *smiles*
About that new songbook that you have - I can't remember from which singer...?
no subject
Date: Friday, 23 June 2006 04:31 pm (UTC)